If you thought England’s Ashes capitulation would lead to their media getting the knives out, you were right.
The reaction to Sunday’s third Test defeat to go 3-0 down in the series has been swift and savage.
Former England captain Geoffrey Boycott, a long-time critic of the Bazball ethos, said coach Brendon McCullum should be punted and captain Ben Stokes needs to be told to rein in the gung-ho approach or they will find another captain.
“A lot of credit should go to Brendon McCullum and Ben Stokes for what they have done for our cricket but it is obvious that Bazball has run its race,” he wrote in The Telegraph.
“Hubris has taken over from common sense and that cannot be allowed to carry on.
“Stokes and McCullum are like men digging a hole to nowhere. If what you are doing isn’t working then stop digging. Change is absolutely necessary to step up to the next level. What would I do? Change the coach.
“We are tired of this duo talking a good game but not delivering against the best teams.”
And vice-captain Harry Brook is not the man to take over, according to Boycott, after his string of reckless dismissals.
“I wouldn’t want Harry Brook as the new captain. How could he ask batsmen to act more responsibly when he attempts some of the most irresponsible strokes you can imagine?”
Barney Ronay at The Guardian evoked John Lennon to ask what was the point of all this Bazball build-up when the end result is a very familiar one.
“So this is Christmas. And what have we done? The Ashes is over. With two Tests still to come.
“It has taken 11 days of active Test cricket for this powerfully resourced England and Wales Cricket Board machine to collapse like a castle of dust, vibes and blue-sky wiffle, and to do so before the southern summer has reached its midpoint.
England’s captain Ben Stokes and head coach Brendon McCullum. (AP Photo/Ajit Solanki)
“England’s failure lies in the nature of that defeat, in losing not just quickly but sloppily, losing in a way that speaks to a basic lack of tension and discipline, a refusal not just to do your homework, but to recognise that homework exists at all.
“Stokes is an excellent, cricket-smart, emotionally curious England captain. Teams lose, captains lose. This is a person who is very clearly in the right job.
“Cut to McCullum, out there on the grass doing his best to filibuster, talking about transcendent mental spaces, admitting that he basically just didn’t know how to prepare his team, offering thought-blurts, guidelines, abstract ideas.”
Telegraph cricket correspondent Nick Hoult said England’s poor preparation was a crucial factor in their humiliation.
“Australia have dismantled the concept of Bazball and their mental hold over English cricketers is stronger than ever.
“An England team that loves to talk up its ability to create history will go down as yet another bunch who crumbled when faced with the challenge of winning in Australia.
“Bazball was fun while it lasted but it amounted to nothing of substance when it mattered in series against Australia and India.
“Of all the away Ashes defeats this century, this one is the lamest because England had the talent to win and a method they believed in. But good cricketers badly underperformed because they were underprepared, which is unforgivable.”
Mike Atherton was also dismayed at the touring team’s lack of substance in getting ready for the toughest trip on the global calendar.
“Australia were precise, especially with the ball and in the field where they held high standards for much longer periods, while England’s lack of cricket, a failure of planning and rigour, left them playing catch-up,” the former England captain wrote in The Times.
“England have been 25 per cent worse than their capabilities. They simply haven’t done themselves justice.
Australia’s players celebrate after winning the third Ashes Test. (AP Photo/James Elsby)
“This will be the cue for some to bleat about the failings of domestic cricket, but that should be avoided. Stokes had the players to lay down a decent challenge here, but they arrived at the Perth Test ill-prepared for what was to come, which resulted in them being woefully short of match-readiness for the toughest challenge in cricket.”
The Independent‘s Cameron Ponsonby said Stokes simply cannot resign because there is no viable alternative.
“It would be in keeping with his character, however, to offer his resignation were it to continue in this fashion, despite his post-match assertions that he has not lost his appetite for the job.
“But a look around the changing room should hasten the ECB to ask him to reconsider, should that offer come.
“Lack of a better alternative is rarely a good reason to do anything, but what choices do England have? Harry Brook is the vice-captain of the Test team and white-ball captain, but, really? Ben Duckett, Zak Crawley or the potentially dropped Ollie Pope are other options. Don’t laugh. Those are the names.”