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The following post is an excerpt from The Tennis Parent’s Bible.
Accelerated Growth Blunders
Regardless of the comfort level, accelerated growth demands aborting ineffective strokes, strategies or tactics and systematically re-tooling them. Change is mandatory for growth.
“Change is the only thing that’s permanent.”
Not Seeing Stumbling Blocks as Steppingstones
Here’s a terrific example: a few years back, Molly Scott (former 2006, SCTA #1, Dartmouth College #1 standout) sprained her non-dominant left wrist.
Her initial position was to follow protocol which was no tennis for 4-6 weeks. Molly called saying, “Frank, I have to cancel my training for 4-6 weeks because my left arm is sprained.”
I said, “That’s upsetting, but we needed some time to switch focus anyway. This actually fits into a new developmental plan. We’ll begin to organize your proactive patterns and between point rituals, we’ll develop your one-handed slice backhand drop shot and your low, backhand volley. Let’s begin today with a new 4-week crash course on lower body fitness and stamina.” Molly’s voice dropped to this low, quiet depressed tone, “ooohhh….really..aahh…that’s… um….super.”
Six weeks later Molly beat a top ten player in the nation as she applied her newfound slice backhand drop shot to perfection!
Perfectionism
Perfectionists are often unwilling to learn and improve because their short comings may be exposed. Their overriding primary concern is to prove that they’re always right. They are referred to as “un-coachable.” Does this antagonistic defensive behavior hurt their chances of success? You bet, in tennis and in life.
“Parents and athletes must accept the fact that the road to the top will include failures, painful emotions, obstacles and setbacks, which are inevitable parts of the journey.”
Constructive criticism to a perfectionist isn’t seen as a positive step toward a better performance. It threatens to expose their flaws, which is a catastrophic assault on their self-worth. Sadly, they don’t want the truth…They want to be correct.
“The perfectionist will find fault in paradise.”
If you have a perfectionist athlete, spouse or coach, ask them to be open to suggestions, be willing to discuss options and be interested in feedback and teamwork. Maximizing potential at the quickest rate depends on a growth mindset.
“Success is more of a function of persistence than perfection.”
Focusing Only on Strokes
Here’s a statement that should be obvious by now. Knowing how to hit strokes and knowing how to win under stress are different animals.
The #1 statement I hear daily from concerned tennis parents is “My child’s the better player, yet he can’t win!”
The solution lies in the school methodology of teaching. Here’s what I mean, throughout every grade students are taught daily to shift their focus from math to science, from English to history, etc. The common blunder in tennis development is only focusing on a singular subject (fundamental stroke production) year after year. The school methodology consistently delivers well rounded young adults. Following that protocol will maximize your child’s potential at a quicker rate.
Believing Quantity of Court Time is Quality Court Time
If your child has a reoccurring nightmare of losing to pushers in tournaments, spending 6 hours a day drilling net skimmers back and forth in an academy is not going to help. After tournament matches, it’s the parent’s responsibility to provide detailed information to the coach. This is done through charting or videotaping of the match. This information exchange customizes the quality of your athlete’s lesson and maximizes the quality of each training session.
It takes an experienced eye to actually spot and analyze your youngsters match tendencies. You will speed up the developmental process by paying a high IQ coach to actually cancel their days’ worth of lessons and attend your child’s tournament matches. Please don’t expect them to work for free. Does the bread winner of your family work for free?
Neglecting the Between Point and Change Over Rituals
Guess when the critical mental, emotional toughness issues take place? When the ball is going back and forth or between points? Between points.
“Professionals think about a hand full of thoughts a hundred times in a single match. Juniors think about a hundred different thoughts in a single match!”
Does your child have a problem with any of the following tennis components? Time management, mistake management, anger management, implementing patterns, dissecting opponents, controlling their heart rate, controlling their emotions, distraction control, quieting their mind, avoiding lapses in concentration, controlling self-condemnation, self-charting and/or controlling nervousness. If you said “yes” to any of these, your child can benefit from rituals. Remember to schedule dress rehearsals. Youngsters have to rehearse these protocols in practice sets before they become comfortable enough to apply them correctly in actual tournament play.
Ignoring Their B and C Game Plans
Spend a few moments to discuss your child’s primary and secondary styles of play in matches. Styles include hard hitting baseliners, all court, net rushers and retrievers Set up practice sets for your child against lower-level players and ask your child to rehearse their secondary styles of play. Champions have mastered more than one style.
My step- daughter, Sarah played her first adult U.S. Open at age 15. In the first round, Sarah’s opponent came out with her plan A (hard hitting baseliner). Sarah won the first set 6-4. At the start of the 2nd set, the opponent switched to plan B (net rusher) and Sarah went up 4-1. The opponent then switched to plan C (moonball/retriever), Sarah’s least favorite style. Sarah was amazed to see a 30-year-old WTA veteran pushed her way to a $15,000 victory in the 3rd set.
Overlooking the Pain Principle
Remember the old saying? “If you keep on doing what you’ve always done, you’ll keep on getting what you’ve always got.” Players hit common walls in their development. One of those walls is resisting change.
If your child view’s change, as more painful than losing, they’ll continue down the same losing path. It’s so painful for some to change a flawed grip, stroke or stance, that they’d rather accept the pain of losing than deal with changing.
Great things begin to happen when the pain of losing starts to be more powerful than the pain of changing. Once they accept the fact that a change has to be made, they are on their way to the next level. This is where great parenting comes in.
“For some, a comfortable old – bad habit is less painful than the temporary pain of fixing it.”
Assuming that Tennis Speed is Only Foot Speed
Tennis specific speed-training requires a combination of foot speed and anticipatory speed.
Heredity plays an important role in your child’s muscle type. Parents and coaches can’t improve the genetic predisposition of an athlete, but they can nurture both their foot speed and anticipatory speed. The path to better court coverage lies in avoiding hesitation and anticipating situations.
Anticipatory speed is greatly increased by understanding and rehearsing the art of vision control. Here’s a sports myth “keep your eye on the ball.” I suggest shifting focus from narrow vision (watching an incoming ball) to broad vision. Broad vision is picking up visual clues as the ball travels toward the opponent. (This topic is covered in detail in the Section IV Common Questions and Solution: Parental Accountability.)
“If you’ve never faced conflict with your tennis phenom, you’ve never been a great tennis parent.”
Parents who fully commit to their child’s passion can spend the rest of their life satisfied that they’ve succeeded in the most important job of their lives.
Not Having an Entourage
Youngsters that improve at the quickest rate have a full entourage. This includes private hitters, technical teachers, mental/emotional coaches, off-court trainers and clinics.
Customizing the style of coach to your player is important. Choose wisely because the two leading influences on your athlete are you and the coaches you hire!
Being Oblivious to Periodization
Parents are often so blinded by winning that they unknowingly sabotage their child’s success. This is especially true in the beginner and intermediate levels of competition. Understanding when to train the different elements of your child’s game is called periodization. It’s based on the upcoming tournament schedule.
Asking your child to bulk up in the gym, run five miles, or to dismantle and fix a flawed stroke a day or two before a big event are samples of poor periodization training. Adding an unfamiliar element the day of a match also falls into this category.
An essential parental skill is choosing your battles. It is important to understand when to put your foot down and pick a battle. Starting a war right before a scheduled lesson will pull your child into the wrong mental state and surely destroy any hopes of a productive session. It is also a waste of your money. Likewise, choosing to battle the day of a scheduled match is a sure fire way to drain your youngster’s emotional batteries and sabotage the actual peak performance you are seeking.
Neglecting Smart Work
Great coaches have the ability to zero in on players weakness long before players or parents even know it exist. High IQ coaches are a bit like a fortune tellers who can read the future. We see mechanical –structural damage the days leading up to an event and we know which components will surely crack under the strains of stressful competition.
If your child has some major holes in their game, please don’t continually send them off to competition. The opponent doesn’t have to beat your child because they’ve come to the game broken. That’s a little like sending a battleship off to war with structural holes in its hull. That majestic ship’s going to sink all by itself.